Standing there. At the end of the bed . Looking over at you as you sleep. My switch flipped . I didn’t want it to . I couldn’t control it . I guess this is where it ends. you are sleeping like a baby , yet you don’t know the happiness you have just lost . The children that will never be born; the laughter that will never be heard . You lost your safe haven. You lost the only part of your life that is worth anything . I am in tears for you. Bawling, right next to you . you could never fathom the love I had for you . the lengths to which I would have gone , for a righteous life with you . you will search the world , and never be satisfied . I know that now . The deepest fulfillment I have ever felt , was seeing the smile on your face . I chose you , every single day of my life . Never did I have a doubt , never did I stray . tomorrow you will say goodbye to your better half forever , and the minute you leave my sight , you will no longer have a hold on me. you will be all on your own in this world . I weep for you . the loneliness you will feel. the regret . The pure torturous agony that will rip through your battered soul until you wither away ; and you most certainly will . your fate is sealed . I know now that not even you can change it . your mid morning departure will double as your funeral , in the most symbolic sense , that is exactly what it is. I will wear black. I will soon forget all about you , and all of the memories that fuelled my drive to Continue living will also be gone ; as if we had never met . April 27 it is indeed . I will kiss you a few more times as you sleep. I will allow the memories to flood from my brain , through my heart , and out of my soul. I have to sever the cord . Goodbye , my fictitious flame .